by Bri Hintze and Heidi Phelon
Why it's Difficult to Love Yourself at Times
We love social media. It allows us to connect with loved ones near and far, find adorable clothes or ideas we wouldn’t find otherwise, and get all the latest information. But with the strong presence social media has taken in our lives, it becomes all but impossible to look at posts without comparing our own life and worth. The long string of families posing so candidly as they enjoy a blissful moment while wearing coordinating outfits and enjoying their organic creme brulee, or the endless supply of stylized bloggers, toned and tan, with the perfect ensemble made by Peruvian alpaca farmers, that costs only $3,000 to replicate, is enough to make anyone question whether they are good enough.
What can a person do to fight the negativity that is growing inside of them as they view this content on a daily basis?
5 Ways to Love Yourself
May we suggest five tips to help you more fully embrace, love, and appreciate yourself.
1. Think about everything you can do
Sit down and write everything you do for your family, for your friends, for your job, for yourself. Doing this will help you recognize how talented and unique you are! And hopefully it will help you see you don’t need to be like anyone else to be enough. What you are doing right now is more than you realize and you need to give yourself more credit!
2. Don’t compare yourself
Everyone has a unique set of strengths and weaknesses. You can’t compare your weaknesses against someone else’s strengths. It’s not fair or even accurate. Instead, allow yourself to celebrate others’ strengths while recognizing and valuing the unique strengths you have. And may we add, if you ever get stuck in a rut of the comparison blues, try taking a hiatus from the social media world and getting back into the real world. This usually helps a lot!
3. Practice self-care
For some reason, women—and especially mothers— suffer from a guilt complex when they take time to care for themselves. It’s easy to feel as if you’re being selfish or taking away precious time you could be spending with your family or doing something “more important.” However, taking that time for yourself will leave you energized, less stressed, and more optimistic about your current struggles. Take that extra time and do your hair! Schedule that girl’s night with friends! Treat yo’self! You will come back refreshed and ready to tackle the day with more zeal and vigor than you would have otherwise.
4. Stop with the self-criticism
You are your own worst critic. The voice inside your head can do a lot of damage or a lot of good, depending on what your internal narrative sounds like on a daily basis. Try going a whole day without saying a negative thing about yourself. Try implementing “I am” statements such as: “I am strong” or “I am capable” to replace self put-downs. You will quickly learn how much better you feel when you stop with all the negativity! You wouldn’t be that hard on anyone else in your life, so give yourself the same courtesy.
5. Live an active life
There are so many benefits to exercise we won’t try to list them all here. But one we want to highlight - women who exercise report loving their body more (Kotz and Haupt, 2017). People who exercise also report being able to deal with stress better: despite being just as busy as those who don’t make time for regular exercise, people who workout daily have a better outlook on life and the problems they face (Ibid). Make exercise an essential part of your life!
The Bottom Line
The bottom line is we think that you are strong and beautiful. If you haven’t already been to Cahoots, please come and join us. We are a community of great women to befriend and work out with! Visit www.cahootsfitness.com for more information!
Kotz, D. and Haupt, A. (2017). 7 Mind-Blowing Benefits of Exercise. [online] U.S. News and World Report, Health. Available at: http://health.usnews.com/health-news/diet-fitness/slideshows/7-mind-blowing-benefits-of-exercise
Photos by Shaelynn Marne Photography and are owned by Cahoots Fitness